Film Review--Les Avaleuses (Female Vampire)

Les Avaleuses (Female Vampire)
directed by Jesus Franco
written by Gérard Brisseau and Jesus Franco
starring Lina Romay, Jack Taylor, Alice Arno, Jesus Franco, Luis Barboo, Jean-Pierre Bouyxou

Female Vampire is nothing more than a rather drab soft core porno with a female character who drains the life out of her victims when she’s performing oral sex on them. The film is essentially wall-to-wall nudity with no plot to speak of. There are many scenes of boring sex that seem to go on for an eternity. Perhaps the only real draw is the voluptuous body of lead actress Lina Romay. It’s the only thing this film has going for it and it’s on display for the duration of the film. Apparently she’s something of a cult icon amongst those who can actually tolerate Jesus Franco as a director. For the rest of us, she’s nothing special and if this film is anything to go by devoid of any operating personality.

The story, or lack of it, involves Countess Irina Karlstein (Romay). The film opens promisingly enough with a bare chested Irina walking ever so slowly toward the camera. She’s wearing merely a cape and thigh high leather boots. The camera fetishizes her eyes, the cape, her breasts, her eyes and her boots in single frame shots that seem to have no discernible purpose beyond titillating those lucky few who find themselves fixated on objects that they in turn sexualize for their own fun and profit. The camera seems particularly drawn to her breasts which are given so much screen time they eventually lose whatever power they once possessed. Next, she approaches a farmer of some sort. She again moves slowly and soon enough she’s giving him head and he’s collapsing in anguish. It’s probably the best blow job he’s ever had in his life and the sheer pleasure of it is enough to vanquish him from the land of the living. Irina kills a few more, including women, and never loses the blank expression plastered on her face. She’s also mute which somehow adds to whatever mystique the film makers are going for.

There is a doctor named Roberts (Franco) who seems to think that a vampire serial killer is taking their prey but nothing much is done to further this story line. It’s hard to tell considering most of the film is consumed with sexual encounters that serve no decisive purpose. Irina is apparently insatiable and she can’t have enough of the fucking and sucking. She even writhes around with a rolled up carpet and tries to hump the bed post. She continues to writhe at every possible moment including while taking a bath. She is supposed to be the Queen of Carnality and represent the chthonian nature of sexuality. She also comes across as a lousy lay although exceedingly confident when she’s using her mouth and her tongue. There are several scenes where she plays with her nipples and licks her lips and its about as much of a turn on as an outbreak of boils on one’s face although there are probably people who get off on that as well.

Just like all porn the sex here becomes redundant after a short while. I understand that some prints include inserts of hardcore sex which would at least have the added value of capture and containment to alleviate the tenacious boredom that afflicts every scene. There is one pointless scene where Irina shows up at some sort of dyke sanctuary and they’ve got a luscious blonde chained up with slash marks all over her body. That introduces a more interesting element into the film although by the time Irina is getting whipped with a birch rod it loses its erotic appeal. It’s utterly pointless and does nothing to edify anyone who finds themselves trapped into viewing this thing. I never thought sadism could come off as so utterly banal but they manage to strip it of its sordid glamour in this film which is certainly the exact opposite of what they are attempting.

The film isn’t bad enough to be good and it takes its ludicrous story way too seriously. Still, it is an interesting idea and does have a fuzzy logic to it. Apparently Irina bites the lucky recipient of her love in the genital region and manages to drain them of all their fluids. It’s impossible to imagine how practical this is because it requires such a violent oral sex technique that manages to literally suck so hard that the person simply perishes from the experience. It is true that every orgasm is a little death and that there are succubi who pretty much do the same thing. So, it’s possible that the Great Harlot could be talented enough to perform the necessary action. Apparently she drains her victims of blood but this isn’t demonstrated either which is a major disappointment.

This much nudity only works if there are real horrors to contend with. If there is carnage afoot with sexy blood splatters on faces and breasts then it is perhaps necessary to maintain a level of eroticism within the context of the film.. But here it is just bad porno with lousy music generating zero heat and it clearly fails to satisfy the edicts of what is intended. Sex grows dull very quickly unless it is part of a viable story that is actually worth the effort. Here it is the entire focus and one might as well discard the entire vampire element because nothing at all is done to exploit it. I can believe that Irina is something of a vampire because she does drain the essence from people and that this is the only way she can continue living. That much is clear. It’s only that the sex scenes are way too long. If they were cut back by 80 percent the story might have had room to develop. Unfortunately that is not the case in this film.

There are actresses one would be delighted seeing run around naked for an entire film. But none of them are the kind that ever take their clothes off period. This in turn only accentuates their desirability. Here we have an actress who is playing a character that is supposed to be the most desirable woman on the planet. She is supposed to represent raw sexual need at its basest form. Yet, there is nothing particularly lust-worthy of her performance. Nudity becomes trite after a while and this film proves it. The only time nudity works in a film is when it is important to the story line. Otherwise its merely gratuitous and pointless. I suppose the film hinges on how bad the members of the audience want to fuck Lina Romay. She is certainly attractive enough to garner considerable attention but she’s only a body in this film and wholly without even a hint of a viable personality. She’s flat and dull and lazy and all she brings to the film is meat. It’s a shame because this subject is endlessly fascinating. It could have been made into a terrifying film that explores all of the psychological aspects of such sadistic behavior. It could have done so with limited sex and nudity and still come off as necessary and true.

Overall, this film is about as lousy a “vampire” film as has ever been made. There is no horror, no desire, and no purpose. The film tends to drain the audience of their desire to see any more as the film is rolling. Indeed, one can only sit through it by fast forwarding through all the sex scenes because there is no reason to sit through porn that does not serve a legitimate purpose. Normally, porn is supposed to elicit lustful thoughts and a deliberate mechanical reaction to the stimulating material being presented. I admit that there was a bit of that in this film which only proves its intent all along. It doesn’t want to tell a story. It simply wants to get its audience hot and bothered which is fine for a porn film but not for something that pretends to be cinema.